Signs you’re in a toxic relationship + what to do about it
One of the biggest red flags for a toxic relationship is that feeling of losing yourself – struggling to hold onto your authentic experience. This ultimately leads to powerlessness, which makes it incredibly hard to disentangle yourself from the toxic relationship
Toxic relationships have a way of slowly eating away at your self esteem and authenticity and making you question your own intuition, that gnawing sense inside that all is not well. If this feels familiar, go through the list below and check if any of the red flags align with your experience.
Signs of a toxic relationship:
- You feel emotionally unsafe
- Conversations regularly spiral into emotional arguments
- There is an imbalance of power
- You struggle to access and believe your own emotions, thoughts and experiences (a product of codependency and/or gaslighting
- You feel criticised and put down
- You take on too much or too little responsibility
- You feel controlled
- You feel resentment or anger on a regular basis
Why do we find ourselves in toxic relationships?
Here’s a truth that will make you feel less alone: toxic relationships are endemic in our culture.
I’ve definitely had my fair share, and it took a great deal of work to break the patterns that continually led me back into destructive relationships. It’s because of this work that I can confidently say toxic relationships are 100% based on unconscious beliefs, thoughts and emotions.
Until you examine your own unconscious beliefs, thoughts and emotions, you will continue to attract toxic relationships because they feel familiar at a deep level – even if, consciously, you’re desperate for a relationship that feels good.
How to move past toxic relationships
Listen to yourself. If something doesn’t feel right – if you’re treading on eggshells around your partner, feeling ashamed or resentful or have an intuitive hunch that something is off, don’t ignore it
Find someone who can validate your experience and provide a sounding board for you to untangle your thoughts and access your truth. If you’re accustomed to having your emotions invalidated, and repeatedly blamed, this is an essential step.
Begin to explore your unconscious beliefs, patterns and thoughts. There are many ways to do this, including:
- Journal work. Access my free journal prompts here to begin now
- Creative practices that encourage self inquiry
- My guided audios that use semi-hypnotic states to allow you access to your unconscious memories and emotions
- Breathwork with a trained facilitator
Once you begin to access the unconscious elements that keep you stuck in toxic relationship patterns, you will find more clarity around the actions you need to take in order to transform or change them.
It IS possible for you to transform toxic relationship patterns and experience relationships that are supportive, safe and mutually beneficial x
